Pain Has A Purpose: Embrace It And Discover Your Authentic Self
If you’re not living your purpose on the planet, it’s supposed to hurt, and nothing is supposed to take that pain away.
Donald Epstein, creator of Epienergetics, Network Spinal Analysis and SomatoRespiratory Integration
What Is The Purpose Of Pain?
We live in a society that tends to shy away from pain, but the truth is that is has a profound purpose in our lives.
It doesn’t work to try to get pain to go away because pain is an inevitable aspect of the human experience, whether physical, psychological, or spiritual.
Instead of viewing pain as an obstacle to avoid, embracing it can strip away our false identities and reveal our authentic selves.
Life and pain are not opposing forces; they are interconnected, and understanding this connection is like learning the rules of a game—the most important game there is—the game of life.
By going toward pain instead of avoiding it, we can catalyze our personal growth and navigate life’s challenges with greater understanding and self-awareness.
Increased awareness and understanding of ourselves will inevitably lead to a greater connection with our gifts and an internal motivation to give them.
So, if you’re curious about how pain can be a transformative force and guide you to a more harmonious existence, keep reading to uncover the true purpose of pain in our lives.
Pain Is Inevitable
Here’s a video I created on the purpose of our pain:
If you prefer to do your learning while working in the yard or washing the dishes, listen to the audio podcast version below, or look for the BioSoul Integration Podcast wherever you listen to your audio podcasts.
We all experience pain one way or another, whether it’s physical, psychological, or spiritual pain.
We might get injured or have an accident or get sick.
Someone will eventually hurt our feelings.
Despite our best laid plans life won’t go our way.
At times we won’t be able to get the voice inside our heads that keeps telling us negative things to shut up.
There will be times in life when we doubt ourselves, feel disconnected from Source—feel lost, i.e. spiritual pain (here’s an in-depth blog post I did on how to heal spiritual pain).
We’re going to experience loss, and eventually we’re going to get older and our bodies will break down—and eventually we’ll all die.
I agree… it feels harsh to hear it put so bluntly, but you’ve got to admit that none of it is a lie.
To that extent pain is an integral part of life.
It’s not just a cruel irony.
There is a purpose to pain.
But in our culture people try to avoid it and act as though it doesn’t exist.
We tend to look at it as an obstacle to get around or a problem to rid ourselves of.
We try to avoid it because we think that pain gets in the way of our lives looking the way we think they should look.
But that’s not how pain and life are fundamentally related.
Pain and Life Work Together: Those Are The Rules Of The Game
Life and pain are not opposing forces, they work together.
Those are the rules of the game of life.
If you don’t know the rules of life then it’s going to feel like you’re not very good at the game and it won’t be any fun.
This reminds me of an experience I had playing basketball when I was a kid.
When I became a fifth grader I went out for the basketball team at my school.
During practice we did a lot of running.
They didn’t teach us the rules of basketball; I think they just assumed that everybody knew.
When game time came I was in great shape, but I didn’t know the rules of the game.
I didn’t know that, for example, you couldn’t take more than two steps without dribbling the ball.
I didn’t know that after making a basket, you’re supposed to take the ball out of bounds and then check it back in.
They’d give me the ball and five seconds later the referee would blow the whistle at me.
I was clueless about what I had done or what I hadn’t done and consequently it was a miserable experience all around.
My experience might have been different if someone had taken me aside and taught me the rules of the game.
I might have had a great time and my learning curve would have been reduced by years.
We’re Failing At The Pain Game
My story illustrates our society’s relationship with pain and life.
Collectively we don’t know how pain and life are fundamentally related, and consequently we’re making we’re making a mess of things.
An estimated seven million kids are taking some kind of psychoactive medication.
One out of every six adults is taking anti-depressants.
Then there’s the whole opioid crisis.
People are taking guns to school and killing their classmates.
There’s a lot of pain going around and we don’t know how to approach it constructively.
In my opinion and experience, working with thousands of clients over the last twenty years, it has to do with our knee-jerk tendency to push pain, an essential part of life, away.
Pain’s Not Supposed To Go Away
Author, teacher, mystic and creator of Network Spinal Analysis, Donald Epstein said, “If you’re not living your purpose on the planet it’s supposed to hurt and nothing’s supposed to take that pain away.”
That’s a pretty evocative statement.
This is the assumption I’m working from: We are souls in a physical body and we’re trying to learn how to express our soul’s gifts here on this planet.
Each person has a soul essence that they bring to the table along with certain gifts and skills.
The evolving consciousness of the planet needs each of us to express our soul’s essence and give our gifts.
Shortly after we’re conceived, our nervous system comes online and we sense how everyone is pushing that part of themselves away, rather than embracing those gifts.
As children, experiences we have reinforce the idea that it’s not safe to express our soul’s gifts.
In this way, not trusting our soul’s essence gets passed through our lineage to us.
These unproductive ways of living and being are automatically and unconsciously baked into our nervous systems, a process I explain in this in-depth blog post on the law of entrainment, linked here.
We Become Fragmented
In this way we push important parts of ourselves away and sequester the energy associated with those parts—we fragment ourselves.
Fragmenting ourselves in this way shows up physically, psychologically and spiritually.
We push those parts of ourselves away and adopt these false identities out of a perceived need to survive.
Most of what we end up believing about ourselves is not really based on who we really are, our authentic selves, but on ideas and concepts that come from our lineage.
Pushing away your soul’s essence is painful.
That pain is a beacon leading us back to a connection with our soul’s essence and an expression of our authentic selves.
Pain Draws Us Into The Present Moment
Pain makes us stop and pay more attention to our bodies and lives in the present moment.
It makes us feel more deeply on every level.
When we bring our attention to these feelings, we’re connecting to the life force energy in our bodies—a subset of the intelligence that animates all of life.
When we are connected to the life force energy in our bodies it creates an uplink to that massive intelligence.
When we’re connected to that wisdom we can’t help but let ourselves be influenced by it.
With that wisdom as the main foundation for our bodies and lives, the false identities that we adopted from our ancesters start to crumble.
The Real Purpose of Pain: To Dissolve Our False Self And Reveal Our Authentic Self
If you look back at some of the hardest and most painful times in your life, you might recognize that those trials and tribulations changed you in positive ways.
Think about it… The biggest and most important changes in your life probably involved some pain and discomfort.
The people who have the greatest positive impact on the world are often those who have experienced great hardships.
Maybe they were imprisoned, tortured, or had family members who were killed or held captive as prisoners of war.
Their hearts were broken but they were also broken open.
Because of their hardships they became capable of great compassion and and a passion to help others.
Embracing Pain Is The Solution
Pain is not an obstacle to the forward movement of our life.
It’s actually the portal that leads us to a more authentic version of ourselves.
Life is constantly transforming and since we are embedded in the fabric of life, it is constantly inviting us to change as well.
Pain is an agent of life.
It purifies us until we become the person we came here to be.
This transformation is happening anyway.
We can lubricate the process of our transformation by letting our attention rest on the sensations that arise as a result of the pain.
This goes for emotional as well as physical pain.
Instead of avoiding painful times in our lives and trying to bury those feelings, come toward them.
Life is transforming you.
It is purifying you, allowing your soul’s gifts to come to the surface so they can be expressed as they were intended to be.
The Ultimate Pain To Purpose Book
My book, If It Didn’t Hurt: How To Resolve Your Pain And Discover Your Life Purpose is the ultimate guide to embodying your pain’s wisdom and integrating your soul’s essence.
Click the link to buy it and/or read the first chapter of my book for FREE!
I look forward to helping you express more life,
Jay
About the Author Dr. Jay Uecker
Dr. Jay Uecker is the founder of the BioSoul Integration Center near Boulder, Colorado where he's been practicing for over 20 years. He’s an author, chiropractor, healer, and online soul integration coach who weaves Network Spinal Analysis, intuitive Parts Work, Brainspotting, SomatoRespiratory Integration, and body-centered awareness practices into his own technique, which he calls BioSoul Integration. His work helps people release unconscious resistance stored in the nervous system so they can embody their soul’s gifts and express their purpose more fully. Dr. Jay offers group healing sessions and one-on-one care, both in-person and online. He also offers a self-paced online course and a growing collection of transformational books. For a limited time, claim your FREE copy of If It Didn't Hurt: How to Resolve Your Pain and Discover Your Life Purpose.
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